This Sunday is the one-year anniversary of Deb's death. It has been a hard year, actually, it has been a hard four years. She battled Stage 4 Colon Cancer for nearly three years before it finally wore her down. Since her death, I have been battling grief, depression, and trying to keep functioning and doing what I need to do to keep a roof over my head. I wish I could share some sort of glorious testimony about how peace had overtaken me and life has worked out. But I can't, without lying. It's been hard. There have been bright spots, but all in all, it's been less than great.
I say this not just for myself, but for anyone who is grieving. If you are one of those people who said "call me if you need anything", please answer the phone. In the widow(er) groups I have belonged to, there is a common refrain of how people just slowly slip away. Surely some of us may talk too frequently about our loss and our pain. Some may seem to be stuck in a place. I have attended a Grief Share grief group and retained a therapist to help me process all of this. But I, and others have noticed how couples we once hung out with now seem awkward around us. The third wheel phenomenon is real. My request to you is to reach out to anyone who is grieving a loss - spouse, child, parent, sibling, job, dream etc - and just sit with them. Have a ministry of presence and let them know that someone cares. They don't need words of wisdom, they need a person. Be that person. In doing so, you will fulfill Paul's command in Galatians 6:2 to " bear one another's burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ."
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